update

wanted to check in and let everyone know how our move is going...

splendidly!

thursday started out rough. 

i woke up with an AWFUL sore throat and elliot didn't let us sleep much.

we got up early to finish packing stuff up and then the movers ended up being an hour late.

elliot was wonderful in the car. i managed to schedule so that we nursed, then hopped in the car and he passed out for 2 1/2 hours.  we woke him up when we stopped for lunch - changed him, nursed him, entertained him.

he also fell in love with a sock monkey.

so naturally, we purchased it for him.

he didn't cry at all.

now we are in oklahoma visiting ryan's brother and his family for a few days.

two nights ago elliot woke up every two hours to nurse...last night he gave me a 5 hour stretch. praise jesus.

he also didn't go to bed until 11pm.........

question:

el is 4 1/2 months old and has taken immense interest in food.

he stares at it and starts drooling and tries  to grab it if it's close enough to him.

i have let him taste things - mostly bananas or other fruits.

but last night we were at a pizza place before the football game and i let him taste a little piece of a garlic roll and he tried to eat it and then was hysterical when i pulled it away.

sooo, is he ready?

i was planning on doing mostly baby led weaning so letting him eat it would have been fine but this mama doesn't want him to grow up so fast :(

one more sleep.

until i move away from nashville.

halloweenie

newness and comfort food.

we move in four days ya'll.

FOUR DAYS.

we finally locked in a place to live, which is a blah apartment much smaller than our current place and a million dollars more, and i had to compromise on a lot...like washer/dryer in elliot's closet, oh well.

we have a place to live, in a safe area that was a little cheaper than what we were looking at and a much cheaper deposit.  it's also across the street from a park, has a pool and is 15 minutes to ryan's work.  and there is a close starbucks.

it's really strange to think that my time in nashville is over.

i remember about 4 1/2 years ago, sitting in my room in lake tahoe thinking about how my time there was over and dreaming about a life of music in nashville.

and then driving across the country with whatever fit into my little black jetta.

now,

i am leaving nashville with a husband, a dog and a baby.

still all in my little black jetta.

plus a moving truck,

and going all the way back to the west coast.

where we don't have any friends, we don't have a church, we don't have a chiropractor.

oy.

it feels right though, 

i think we are both in a good place for the move.

we feel okay about finding a new church,

new friends.

i actually want new friends, parent friends.

most of the friends we have in nashville are people we met in college, and we are in such a completely different place in life than they are.

i find myself continually being let down by a lot of my non parent friends...they just don't get it.

i really think the lord has put us in a place where we feel okay leaving.

this was really apparent yesterday when we had our yard sale and only two people we knew came.

even after posting it on facebook and sending out mass texts,

none of our friends came to support us.

so going somewhere that will allow us to get to know people who are in the same stage of life as us i think will be really great and needed.

regardless,

we will really miss a lot of people in nashville.

we do have a lot of very close friends that i know will be our friends for a long time.

and a lot of people who have really blessed us, especially once elliot was born, that aren't parents that we love and are grateful for.

anyway, we have been trying to enjoy us some nashville so that means eating at all our favorite places...

last night we indulged with some loveless cafe.

man will i miss some southern comfort food. mmm creamed corn and fried okra.

we bought some blackberry preserves {my absolute favorite} from their little store and a red coffee mug to have a little nashville momento.

in other news,

another tree fell on our house and pulled out our cable line and electricity line.

soooo...

it burnt out our microwaved - now when you open it...it starts microwaving. yikes.

ruined our tv, cable box, internet modem and router...

HOOOOORAY!

pumpkin patchin it.

us at gentry's farm last year:

last year, we were the only ones there without kiddos.

{unbeknownst to me, i was pregnant}

and we talked the whole time about how much fun it would be to have a kiddo with us and i secretly hoped that next year we would.

well we have one!

and we went, and he was a grump the entire time.

until the very end.

i nursed him and then he was stoked.

but alas, we were leaving to go to our going away party.

oh well,

maybe next year.

we also didn't pick any pumpkins because of the move.

on this day, one year ago.

real quick shout out to this little nugget...

{"wait, isn't this blog a shout out to him?" you ask...well, yes.}

i found out i was pregnant with you one year ago today.

peed on a clear blue digital ultra and went outside and played with owen.

i forgot about it .

and then saw it sitting on the bathroom sink when i walked by...

i leaned into the bathroom on my toes and didn't see the word "not" in front of "pregnant".

i basically threw up.

{and not because i was pregnant - never got morning sickness - but because it confirmed my suspicions after 3 negative tests and i was just shocked}

this crazy feeling in my stomach happened and i still get the same one every time i look at the photo i took of the test.

which i then sent to your daddy and grandma...

who {grandma} called me saying "why are you sending me a photo of a test that says you aren't pregnant?" and i then had to yell at her over the phone for 10 minutes telling her that it said i was INDEED pregnant.

and then well, 

i craved mexican rice with queso,

the mere thought of guacamole induced gagging,

i didn't keep the secret very well,

i slept a whole lot,

and i mean like...all the time.

we heard your fast heartbeat,

we were able to tell everyone,

we had a scare,

i ate whatever i wanted,

i took real good care of myself,

we talked about home birth,

i found my doula, 

i felt you kick for the first time laying on the couch,

we saw you on ultrasounds,

we found out you were a boy,

we took hypnobabies classes,

i ate more of what i wanted,

i dreamed about you,

you had the hiccups all the time,

i shopped for baby clothes,

i wore bikinis,

i started to get uncomfortable,

i ate a lot of ice cream,

i peed a lot,

we took a lot of photos,

you stopped kicking and started nudging,

i would see your elbow or knee push out,

i hated how you lodged your feet in my ribs {i can still feel it},

my boobs started leaking,

we prepped for your arrival,

you dropped,

i could breathe again,

i felt your fingers move around,

we packed the hospital bags,

i thought i was in labor every day,

i had to sit leaning forward with my legs spread whenever i was sitting,

it was summer and it was hot,

i didn't get any stretch marks,

i gained 30 pounds,

i knew you would come early, i knew you would start your journey at night,

and one morning, i woke up at 12:15 am, 12 days before your due date with strong, painful contractions every 6 minutes and thought to myself "hmm June 12th feels right".

and then you were here.

when packing drives you nuts...

a million little thoughts

one year ago today i peed on a stick and it told me i wasn't pregnant.

it was the third test to say that,

and it was a day before my "missed" period.

"i guess i'm not" i thought and i was oh so sad...

and curious as to why i still felt pregnant.

anyway,

tomorrow will be ONE YEAR since i missed my period.

i haven't had a period in over a year ya'll.

that is something to celebrate.

i tell people that i would rather just get pregnant again than have another period.

{i don't really want to though...}

have i mentioned we are moving in 13 days and we still don't have a place to live???

ryan's company just told us they want us to switch moving companies and i have half our house thrown in boxes and the other half on craigslist.

what is one to do when you have a to-do list about a mile long and little monies??

anyway...

last night was definitely a full moon.

elliot cried for 2 hours straight with nothing wrong with him.

well, he didn't nap like at all during the day.

but he was happy all day but when 6 pm hit, man.

also, 

ryan is out of town so it is just me to deal with the wrath of a screaming baby.

it took me 40 minutes to calm him down on the glider before i could even get him to nurse.

oh the drama.

i semi blame myself for this one...

i showed elliot how to suck his thumb and he has been trying to do it again ever since.

this is what he was doing all night during his sob fest.

he only tries with his right hand, he spreads is fingers and then kinda sticks that tiny thumb into his cheek and loudly sucks.

it's so cute, and i am super impressed with his memory and attempts.

but i'm cursing myself for a bad habit i may have just started.

in other news,

homeboy weighs 14.1 lbs and is 26 in long.

23rd percentile for weight and 86th for height ha...

and did he ham it up with the nurses oh my...

such a flirt, they were all so sad when i told them we were moving.

also, part of elliot's head is flat...

i voiced my concern and he wanted to refer us to a pediatric neurosurgeon to further assess...

womp womp.

{think i figured out the cryingfest - elliot was holding a sweet potato fry last night and apparently swallowed a piece because there was one in his poop this morning...}


{last week waiting for daddy to be done with his surgery}

four months old

my little elliot is four months old today!

again, i can't believe how fast this month has gone by!

this month he has been rolling over,

grabbing his feet,

playing with his hands,

sucked his thumb once,

reaching for toys.

elliot loves:

sleeping in mama's bed

sleeping with mama

watching his pup

chewing on his hands

sucking on mama's fingers

nursing

when you blow air through your lips

kisses

being held tummy to tummy

going anywhere

going to new places

looking at trees

elliot hates:

hearing his daddy talk to him through the phone

owen barking

loud noises

being away from mama

being put to bed when there are people over

sleeping alone

being ignored

my baby has grown so much it's hard to believe.

i can't believe he will soon have teeth and start eating solids.

i started thinking about when we want to wean and my heart got really achy.

i think i will have a harder time with it than he will.

but that wont be for a while,

hopefully.

i feel right at home being a mama now.

i'm used to it and i feel good at it.

i love spending all my time with this little man.

we got life changing news this month and we're excited for the future.

elliot went on his first trip and did amazingly.

he also slept for an 8 hour stretch...even though it hasn't happened again.

he started laughing and it's adorable.

and he makes the most heart melting frown.

here is elliot this month:

{complete with me looking at my contraction counter, ryan after surgery and my dog shaking in fear of the ac in my car}

watch my baby grow:

one, two, three.