lovin on yo mama.

poor ryan,

our one year wedding anniversary and mothers day fall on the same day.

and since i have carried this baby for 8 months,

we're celebrating me as a mother.

so to help him out,

i have made a little list of motherly things i wouldn't mind owning.

plus, i would like to keep holidays separate...

like, i plan to get him something super manly and fatherly for fathers day...

so get me something for the house, that i don't really need but i would want but wouldn't normally go out and buy because we need or want something else.

and then get me something just for me for the anniversary ;)

all of these are from anthro but i'll link to the listing.

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7

hint: ryan just go to the store and shop for me. kthanksbye.

gets me every time.

i saw this for the first time last week,

and love it.

also,

it makes me cry every single time.

doin what comes naturally!

when we first found out we were pregnant, we both knew we wanted to have a completely natural birth.

after watching the business of being born and doing our own research we discovered how many myths exist about childbirth and how c-sections are almost always done unnecessarily on women who were just uninformed about what was being done to them during their birthing time.

the first biggest thing though, is to find a medical provider/hospital that will support your decision to do things naturally,

and thank goodness nashville has the vanderbilt nurse-midwife program who actually encourage you to do it naturally and make life a whole lot easier when you're writing up your birth and baby preferences since most everything that should happen {that doesn't in most hospitals} is standard at vanderbilt.

all of my questions or concerns about care there are met with reassurance and the answers i want to hear.

after we had decided on them, i also decided that i wanted a doula to attend my birth since neither ryan or i have done this before, and i was concerned about how ryan was really going to act.

if i was crying out in discomfort would he give in and try to get medication for me instead of reminding me about what i really wanted?

i mean, i really didn't know what to expect since we weren't at that point and after my first doula backed out - since she is 5 weeks ahead of me in her second pregnancy - i had a hard time finding one we could afford and that really fit with us.

until a friend from church referred me to her friend who was like a gift from God.

talking with angel about our birth and what we want makes me excited to do it.

she is strong and comforting, experienced and loving and has become a good friend to me throughout.

i usually call her first before my midwife if i have a question or concern.

not to mention she lives right down the street from me and is excited to be a part of our birthing time.

but even after having these two major things set in stone,

i still didn't feel like i could really do it naturally.

then suddenly i started hearing about hypnobabies everywhere.

including from my doula.

and decided it was a good fit,

especially after watching these videos online.

essentially retraining your brain and practicing self hypnosis in order to have a pain-free natural birth.

and let me tell you, it's amazzzzing!

ryan and i just finished our 6 week classes with them last week and now it's time for me to be studying on my own.

the classes gave us so much information about healthy pregnancy and info about procedures normally performed at hospitals {scaaaary stuff ladies} and i felt a little overloaded so i took a week off last week, which i probably shouldn't have but i'm ready to get back.

there is still some reading ryan and i both need to do in the books and then i spend about 30-40 minutes a day listening to tracks or to ryan reading me self hypnosis scripts to practice for my birthing time, i also need to listen to a 30 minute track that's all pregnancy affirmations.

not to mention being diligent in working out and getting all the water and nutrition i need to keep this baby growing.

i'm still trying to figure out all the things we want and don't for our baby right after he is born, which is overwhelming enough but at least i know what i expect and want from my birth and i'm so glad we have made the decisions we have made.

xo

my life is one big joke.

things that are pretty funny...

1. this photo:

2. when my chiropractor adjusted my hips and i let out a toot and then immediately said "excuse me!" only for ryan to laugh for the rest of the session.

3. seeing a segway strapped to the back of a honda element on the interstate.

4. ryan pointing out a very large little girl wearing a piano neck tie and then saying "it's not polite to snare" {like drum, get it...accident}

5. when ryan decided to throw his coke all over the table and floor at costco when he was trying to pick it up.

6. sitting in the grass together in the backyard and imitating our dog. ie: letting our tongues blow in the wind.

7. then both ripping fist fulls of grass out and throwing them at our dog.

other than the photo, this all happened yesterday and it was ridiculous.

31 weeks.

dear baby,

this week has been a rough one.

i have been battling a bad cold for the last few days and i'm guessing you have been too.

you haven't been as active but neither have i.

you're moving around more than enough though so i don't have to worry too much.

we picked up a couple last things we need for you and finished our last hypnobabies class.

we have been talking about the zoo and other activities we can't wait to enjoy with you a lot lately.

we went on a hospital tour and saw the place that you will be born at.

i just can't believe how soon you will be here,

even though it still feels like a while.

but please, take your time, don't come too early.

i want you to be healthy and happy so you can come home with us instead of staying at the hospital.

see you soon.

xo

picture book.

did i mention i have been fighting off a cold for the last two days?

so i have been spending a lot of time on le computer, and saw this cute idea over at my friend ellen's blog for a photo prompt entry and decided to join in the fun.

1. someone i spend a lot of time with...

2. a picture of myself...

3. a picture of someone in my family...my mom pregs with me...

4. a picture of something that makes me happy...

5. an old picture of myself...

6. a picture of a sibling...

7. a photo from high school...

8. a random photo of me and my significant other...

9. a photo i've never posted before...

10. a relative of mine (nana with my immediate fam)

11. a person i can tell everything to...

12. a picture from everyday life...

13. a picture from a place i love...

14. a picture that reminds me of old times...(first time i heard my song on the radio 2007)

15. a picture from a great night...

16. an unusual picture...(mom from elf!)

17. a picture of my spare time...

18. a picture of the person closest to me...

19. a picture of a person who is always there...

20. a picture of a time in life i miss (freshmen in college)

21. a picture from last summer...

22. a picture that makes me sad...(because this doesn't happen every day, yes that is the hoff)

23. a picture i always laugh about...

24. a crazy picture...

25. latest picture of myself...

26. a picture of my parents at my age...

27. a picture from the best days of my life...

28. a picture from my favorite vacation...(honeymooooon)

29. a picture of an accomplishment...

30. a picture i'm satisfied with...

it was so much fun to look through my whole photo library and search for old photos.

if you guys do a post like this, let me know - i would love to see em!

lovin, is what i got...and lots of baby things.

as my due date rapidly approaches, we are getting everything prepared for this little man.

and by "we" i really mean, "me".

i think ryan still is living in the whole "we have 9 months to do these things" when really we have, at the least 6 weeks.

i'm feeling pretty good about the basics,

his nursery has the necessities - a crib, dresser, changing table, the glider should get here any day.

his crib is made and we have enough blankets to get us by (i would like to get one or two more),

but this is all good because we decided to skip the bassinet and have him sleep in the crib immediately

{ahhh neglectful parents alert}

but really,

his room is 4 1/2 steps from ours and his crib is against our bedroom wall.

we will all be fine.

i'll have the monitor on full volume to hopefully drown out my husband's sleep breathing anyway.

i'm going to be exclusively breast feeding so i have my boobs ;)

we have a single breast pump, milk storage containers, nursing bras and nursing pads.

all i still need there is some sort of cream/ointment for my abused nipples {you have any favorites??}

we have our ergo carrier and infant insert,

we're ordering our stroller and car seat next week,

we have a diaper bag but no diapers...oops.

i have a waterproof pad under my side of the bed,

and we bought a second set of bed sheets.

i have my pjs for the hospital,

and know what i'm bringing for the baby.

and then of course i need all the special things to help me during my labor, birth and recovery. wont talk about em here but you can read dear baby's post and get all the TMI you want.

my breast pump came in the mail yesterday and i felt completely overwhelmed trying to read the instructions,

sometimes i feel like i am pumping way too much baby information into my head and i'm about to just crash.

but i can thank our current medical system for feeding me lies about how birth should be for so long that i now have to learn the natural way things should go and how terrible some medical interventions are.

here's to makin sweet little babies.

30 weeks.

sorry this post is like, oh i don't know 4 days late,

our internet modem is shot so we have been stealing internet from a neighbor.

hopefully it's getting fixed today!

dear baby,

we have entered our final countdown with you,

you could come in 10 weeks, or 9 or 8 or even 7...

or 12.

it's crazy to think you will be here with us so soon.

i'm now constantly imagining you with us when it's just your daddy and myself driving, or walking or sitting at a coffee shop.

how we will forever have a new little human.

we have gotten into gear getting everything ready for you {and for me} for your birth and what comes after.

we are making travel plans for your family members,

making sure we have enough blankets for you,

and getting everything in place so the three of us can be as calm and comfortable as possible when you arrive.

some fun things you have been doing to me lately:

extreme lower back pain that makes me limp,

constant heartburn (so you must be a hairy little babe)

charlie horses in the middle of the night

pushing down into my pelvis like you are ready to come out.

xo

daddy, i lost mommy in the anthropologie store...

as we are all probably aware by now,

it is easy to get sucked into this blog world.

as we are probably even more aware there are some blogs way more popular than others and those bloggers only cyber communicate with the other super popular bloggers.

{can we ever escape high school??}

recently, i have seen certain big time bloggers post that they are thrilled to be nominated as the most fashionable mommy - in the blogsphere.

don't get me wrong,

it's great for them but i often wonder where their babies are when they are taking 100038437 photos of themselves in their anthropologie outfits and $400 diaper bags.

{anyone watch kim and kourtney take new york? where the hell was baby mason the whole season, i only ever saw his crib}

sometimes i have to take myself away from these blogs because i find myself resenting my own life.

i see all these "things" these fashionable mommies have and own and jealously seeps into my life.

especially now as we are buying up everything for our little boy,

because hey, i wanna look good being a mommy too.

i have almost deleted this blog numerous times to try to escape the black hole it can be.

and sure, i love to look nice and i love things too, but i need to be able to accept the fact that it is completely irresponsible and unreasonable for me to own a petunia pickle bottom cake diaper bag...

orrrrr, really necessary.

anyway.

i don't want to be recognized on here as having great style,

that i always look good no matter what and have expensive and irreplaceable vintage clothing...

{umm hello, i'm about to enter the world of baby vomit and little boy pee guns}

but as a good mother, wife and human being.

who writes in sarcastic undertones sometimes and complains about how her husband still hasn't fixed her screeching dryer.

i probably wont even get dressed for the next year of my life, let alone do anything with my hair.

and i'm fine with that and i hope you all are too.

also, on a somewhat related note...

i loved reading this article about something myself and all the people i know who read blogs wondered about...

READ ME.

this morning i am really missing this...

showers for babes.

this past saturday was a great saturday,

my friends renee, dana, jamie and ashley threw me a little baby shower with all my girlfriends.

it was so sweet and laid back and just what i needed.

we had it at my house, so now you can get a better looksie at the place and the theme was like a vintage, whimsical hot air balloon look {which goes along with the general theme of the nursery}.

renee made that calendar {pictured above} and everyone wrote in the actual day they think i'll have this babe.

it is now hanging in the nursery and looks so cute.

especially with everyone signing their name "auntie so and so"

i think my overall favorite part of the shower,

was afterwards when i read these prompts that every girl filled in

{hanging on the window}

they were filled with hopes and wishes for my baby boy,

some really sweet and others absolutely hilarious.

ie:

"i hope you enjoy the smallest of pleasures"

"i hope you eat tacos everyday"

"i hope you grow a beard"

"i hope you aren't afraid to fall in love"

"i hope you never forget your babysitters"

"i hope you never forget how fearfully and wonderfully you were made"

"i hope you get trashed with me one day"

"i hope you never forget where your keys are"

"i hope you laugh everyday"

i will definitely keep these forever and reread them as often as i come across them and share them with him when he is old enough...especially to hear some of the suggestions all his "aunties" made.

it is so wonderful to see how loved my son already is and the support that surrounds me with my friends.

it meant the world to me that the people who came made time in their busy lives to spend with me on a such an important day.

you only have your first baby once right?

i love all you guys and i can't wait for you to be a part of my baby's life.